Gigi Raven Wilbur: Talking BDSM with the Bisexual Intersex Elder

"I never believed that sex was a sin. And the church always spit it out as a sinful thing."

Today's episode is possibly our most R-rated ever. 

Our guest is a BDSM instructor who wakes up every morning and does erotic affirmations. Gigi lies in bed, gets themself aroused, and then hits play on the affirmations they have recorded on their phone. 

"And I think what happens when we become erotically aroused, we become more receptive. The subconscious becomes more receptive. And so it’s really helped transform my life."

Their sexual interests and desires have been a throughline in their life, something that's been clarifying and also helped them heal. Getting to roleplay a BDSM scene with another person acting as their father — he was a pastor and abusive — was the key to moving on from that trauma as an adult. 

Gigi Raven Wilbur is bisexual, intersex, nonbinary, polyamorous...the list goes on. It's a modern experience of queerness, I've found. We want all of the labels, every single one. Labels can be constricting and whereas people used to fight and push back on these limits, now I talk to more and more people who embrace these contradictions and simply overlay each identity, one on top of another.

And as always, if you enjoyed this interview, please help us to spread the word about our show. 

Text your friends, post on social media, whatever you prefer. We're an independent show and recommending our show is one of the biggest ways that you can help us grow. 

I'm also very grateful to everyone who has signed up for a paid Substack subscription. If you haven't and can, please consider joining. This ensures that we'll be able to continue documenting these stories for years to come. 

Next week a certain former gay congressman joins us...and no, I promise I’m not talking about George Santos. 

Thanks for listening.

Much love,
Jeffrey @jeffmasters1

LGBTQ&A is a reader-supported publication. To support our work, consider becoming a paid subscriber. Click here to learn more.